The Music Man soundtrack – Ya Got Trouble lyrics

Harold:
Well, either you're closing your eyes
To a situation you do now wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the caliber of disaster indicated
By the presence of a pool table in your community.
You got trouble, my friend, right here,
I say, trouble right here in River City.
Why sure I'm a billiard player,
Certainly mighty proud I say
I'm always mighty proud to say it.
I consider that the hours I spend
With a cue in my hand are golden.
Help you cultivate horse sense
And a cool head and a keen eye.
Ever take and try to give
An iron-clad leave to yourself
From a three-rail billiard shot?
But just as I say,
It takes judgement, brains, and maturity to score
In a baulk-line game,
I say that any boob can take
And shove a ball in a pocket.
And I call that sloth.
The first big step on the road
To the depths of deg-ra-Day--
I say first, medicinal wine from a teaspoon,
Then beer from a bottle.
And the next thing ya know,
Your son is playing for money
In a pitch-back suit.
And listening to some big out-a-town Jasper
Telling all about horse-race gambling.
Not a wholesome trotting race, no!
But a race where they set down right on the horse!
Like to see some stuck-up jockey'boy
Sitting on Dan Patch? Make your blood boil?
Well, I should say.
Now friends, let me tell you what I mean.
You got one, two, three, four, five, six pockets in a table.
Pockets that mark the difference
Between a gentlemen and a bum,
With a capital "B,"
And that rhymes with "P" and that stands for pool!
And all week long your River City
Youth'll be frittering away,
I say your young men'll be frittering!
Frittering away their noontime, suppertime, chore time too!
Get the ball in the pocket,
Never mind getting Dandelions pulled
Or the screen door patched or the beefsteak pounded.
Never mind pumping any water
'Til your parents are caught with the Cistern empty
On a Saturday night and that's trouble,
Oh, yes we got lots and lots a' trouble.
I'm thinking of the kids in the knickerbockers,
Shirt-tail young ones, peeking in the pool
Hall window after school,you got trouble!, folks!
Right here in River City.
Trouble with a capital "T"
And that rhymes with "P" and that stands for pool!
Now, I know all you folks are the right kind of parents.
I'm gonna be perfectly frank.
Would ya like to know what kinda conversation goes
On while they're loafing around that Hall?
They're trying out Bevo, trying out cubebs,
Trying out Tailor Mades like Cigarette Fiends!
And bragging all about
How they're gonna cover up a tell-tale breath with Sen-Sen.
One fine night, they leave the pool hall,
Heading for the dance at the Armory!
Libertine men and Scarlet women!
And Rag-time, shameless music
That'll grab your son and your daughter
With the arms of a jungle animal instinct!
Mas-steria!
Friends, the idle brain is the devil's playground! Trouble!
People:
Oh we got trouble,
Harold: Right here in River City!
People:Right here in River City!
Harold:With a capital "T"
That rhymes with "P"
And that stands for Pool,
People:That stands for pool.
Harold: We've surely got trouble!
People: We've surely got trouble!
Harold:Right here in River City,
People:Right here!
Harold:Gotta figure out a way
To keep the young ones moral after school!
People:Our children's children gonna have Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble...
Harold:
Mothers of River City!
Heed the warning before it's too late!
Watch for the tell-tale sign of corruption!
The moment your son leaves the house,
Does he rebuckle his knickerbockers below the knee?
Is there a nicotine stain on his index finger?
A dime novel hidden in the corn crib?
Is he starting to memorize jokes from
Captain Billy's Whiz Bag?
Are certain words creeping into his conversation?
Words like 'swell?"
And 'so's your old man?"
Well, if so my friends,
Ya got trouble!
People:Oh we got trouble!
Harold:Right here in River city!
People:Right here in River city!
Harold:With a capital "T"
And that rhymes with "P"
And that stands for Pool.
People:That stands for pool!
Harold: We've surely got trouble!
People: We've surely got trouble!
Harold:Right here in River City!
People:Right here!
Harold:Remember the Maine, Plymouth Rock and the Golden Rule!
People:Our children's children gonna have trouble,trouble,trouble(cont.)
Harold:Oh, we've got trouble.
We're in terrible, terrible trouble.
That game with the fifteen numbered balls is a devil's tool!
People:Devils Tool!
Harold:Oh yes we got trouble, trouble, trouble!
People:Oh we got trouble here,we got big big trouble!
Harold:With a "T"!
People:With a capital T!
Harold: Gotta rhyme it with "P"!
All:And that stands for Pool!!!